I think everyone involved (I'm with Asperger's) should study the topic, to be able to understand (and then make a corrections to) one's own behavior, instead of believing what other people (including doctors) are saying.
I've heard good things about that book, I probably should get a copy.
I didn't word my question very well. I was wondering where you got your examples. None of the ADHD info I've read says anything about shyness or eye contact. A child playing by themselves would seem to be the exact opposite of the popular notion of what a kid with ADHD is like (assuming that they weren't totally spaced out to the world around them, which you didn't mention).
I'm just interested because that's me. I'm shy, I have minor problems with eye contact (more like I just have problems relating to new people) and I spent a large chunk of my childhood playing by myself with Legos and Transformers. That last bit was one of the reasons my parents said they didn't think I could have ADHD. "But you used to amuse yourself for hours by yourself. You certainly were paying attention to THAT."
http://www.amazon.com/Emotional-Intelligence-Matter-More-Tha... is a good starting point.
I think everyone involved (I'm with Asperger's) should study the topic, to be able to understand (and then make a corrections to) one's own behavior, instead of believing what other people (including doctors) are saying.