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For me, I try to dissect why they make me feel a given way.

I have come to realize that I have a lot of weird trust issues that stem from my desire to be perceived in a given way. Further analysis has helped me realize I want to be perceived that way because it's a defense mechanism for me - by being seen as the person who can fix anything, I feel better about things I can't control like pandemics and unrest. For me this also ties into how I self perceive my own value - being useful gives me value. This then begs the question of why I feel such a strong need to be externally validated...

And obviously your particulars are different but the goal is to open the dust covers and understand what is driving and controlling the mental machine.



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