The first question in any political movement is always the same: Who, whom?

I.e. who's wielding power and over whom are they wielding it.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Who,_whom%3F

> The trouble is deciding who gets to wield that force

Whoever is wielding the force is the one gets to wield it. We can have a more civilized society by strictly limiting the wield the force by limiting opportunity to weild it by clear defined individual rights.

By definition it’s the state (whomever the state allows), since they have a monopoly on force.

Which means as ever it's super important to maintain and preferably improve democratic processes to keep the state accountable for that terrible responsibility.

Also, vote!

The "who" is pretty easy, it's the state. Who they wield it on and to what extent is the open question.