> Action mode focuses on surviving a danger right now. This is the fight or flight mechanism that our brain when it is in an adverse situation. The response is driven by the sympathetic nervous system. It drives up your heart rate, raises blood pressure, dilates your pupil among other things.
It also affects the way we think, and make decisions.
When we are in "action mode," our thinking becomes fairly "binary," and extreme (eg. "Good|Bad", "Fight|Flight", "Hate|Love").
It also focuses on short-term results, and is biased towards assured results, as opposed to "possible" ones.
That's why I find I need to back away from the computer, when I find myself in a stressball. I make bad decisions.
Managers, politicians, and demagogues of all stripes, have used this for centuries, to get people to support their agendas.
To point 1, this almost feels like catch-22. While sleep may be a way to recover from stress, stress is probably the single thing that impacts my sleep the most (aside from alcohol consumption, which is much easier to control).
I had a year-long stretch averaging 4 hours of sleep daily that was extremely difficult.
Tried all of the regular remedies: diet, exercise, reading, prayer, habit changes. My doctor prescribed a medicine to help me calm down at night. That was the first thing that actually helped.
That kept going until I left a very stressful job and landed in a healthy environment with a different employer. I was able to stop the medicine after a couple of months.
All that to say, there are many methods that work for different people and situations. Don't discount speaking with a doctor or therapist, and don't continue through life with bad sleep. It's a really rough way to go.
If you can identify the thing(s) keeping you up at night, and if they're things in your control, consider making changes. Living without good sleep sucks. Do whatever it takes to get good sleep, even if it means big changes.
I was going to suggest that sleeping pills are a good way to re-establish good sleeping patterns. Set a strict sleep schedule, and then take the pills for a few days to a week in that schedule. Once you manage to sleep on this strict schedule for a few days your body's rhythms typically realign so you get sleepy on that schedule. Don't use the pills for extended periods though.
tl;dr - no, there are no solutions. If you cannot fix the source of stress then you’re fucked.
I also agree with the sentiment. Anytime my stress levels rise - my sleep goes back to shit. Is there a solution? Nope!
If you cannot fix the source of stress then you need to learn to embrace the madness. Learn to just accept you’re not getting more than 5 hours of sleep a night and you’ll be better off for it - instead of sitting in bed for 8-10 hours everyday and majority of it wishing you were asleep. Embrace the 2am fall asleep crash and the 6am wake up hustle.
Truly is a nightmare to live through but that’s life.
I've found with time that the easiest way to fall asleep is to try to meditate. Sit there or lay there in a quiet room and just watch your breath going in and out, not chastising yourself or getting frustrated when your mind inevitably wanders. Simply acknowledge that you've gone off track and come back to your breath. Normally in meditation, the goal isn't to fall asleep, but it is definitely something that you can let happen if you want to.
Yes. when you go to sleep don't put any pressure on yourself that you need to sleep X number of hrs or whatever. Just go to bed on regular schedule and be thankful for the amount of sleep you get, actual amount is irrelevant.
What helps me: write down a list of all the things going on, preferably pen on paper.. Allow yourself to do turn on the lights again and write additional stuff on it... Repeat until there's nothing more to write down.
You need to make a conscious effort to become better at managing your stress. When you notice your stress is peaking, try different techniques to relax yourself. Find out what works then you can make that a daily habit to reduce overall stress. Also need to train your mind to flip off the stress switch when it’s time to go to sleep.
It is actually something you can teach yourself to do.
It requires some practice, but the gist of it is to train awareness around your thoughts, and then to dispassionately label your thoughts when you find yourself stuck in a loop about something. Don't engage with them or try to fight them, just say "that's worrying" or or maybe if your source of stress is you're constantly try to solve all the world's problems, you say "I'm problem-solving".
It's important not to make it a struggle. Just label them over and over again. Two hundred times in an hour if that's what it takes.
If you do that over and over again, not only will it become easier each time to the point where it's almost like flipping a switch and your mind flushes all that crap like an airplane toilet and in the absence impressions of the world come rushing in, it becomes very clear how stuck in a bubble you were. Not only that, which is arguably a benefit in itself, you'll also find yourself stuck in those thought patterns less over time.
It depends on what is your main problem. Falling asleep? staying asleep? For the former using melatonin might help (I never use more than 0.5mg a night). I also find that podcasts help me fall asleep once I focus on listening. There are also specific meds that can help with stress which you can take when things are bad (e.g., lorazepam). Just having them by your side can help with your sleep since you know it's there in case you need it. Then of course, sport and meditation are great tools have better quality of life, not just better sleep.
What has helped me a lot: get plenty of sunlight; especially in the morning (very important to our biological clock), started taking probiotics once a day before a meal, I try to eat complex carbohydrates in the morning (fruits, vegetables, beans, seeds); which promotes good gut bacteria and more stable blood glucose levels, exercise every day, no caffeine 8 hours before bed, nothing but water 2-3 hours before bed and I take 10mg of Melatonin most nights before bed (sometimes 20mg).
That is likely way too much melatonin than is needed or helpful. Try taking 1 mg or even 0.5 mg a few hours before you want to fall asleep. Lots of easy to find evidence that common dosages are way too high. Typical person produces anywhere between 0.1 mg and 0.9 mg per day (varies strongly with age). Remember, absolutely none of the supplements in stores are regulated for safety, efficacy, or appropriate dosage levels.
If you do hard physical exercise (weight lifting, forget running), until you are dead tired, and stop drinking stimulants (coffee et al) then you will have good sleep. So simple.
The best way to have a good sleep is to stop being anxious and depressed, forget bad things, stay happy, be relaxed at evening, have a good hormonal profile, eat healthy, have a strict circadian discipline, a loving partner and live a nice live in general.
It was like that for me, until it wasn't. I am still weight lifting but my sleep is much worse if I push too much. Sleep issues are simple only until you have them.
Exercise and make it easy to do. I got a peloton bike and just made it a habit in the morning. I then eased into yoga at night.
When Covid hit, 4 kids home/remote job/divorce all hit at once. I have to do something hard enough that my brain can shut off worrying about the thing. Lizard brain has to be active enough to think threat is gone and shut off.
The hardest days for me are intentional rest days/weeks where I have to be mindful of not having that same release.
I find melatonin really useful, if that's something available where you live (its regulation varies radically between the US and Europe). I find it's best about 30 minutes before bed.
Almost everyone takes too much of it when they do. The actual recommended dose is very low. Efficacy rapidly declines with habitual usage, and effective utilization requires that you go to bed very soon after taking it (lights out, no screens, etc). This said, it can be a good short term solution for sleep issues.
Yes, I've heard that, but in my personal experience I find high doses (relative to the 0.3mg or whatever prescription quantity) effective, with no negative side effects, and I have suffered no loss of efficacy with habitual usage (years). YMMV, but it's certainly worth trying vs continuing to only sleep for four hours every night.
Doesn’t work on everyone. Tried it a couple of times, felt like stoned for six hours laying in darkness rethinking life choices. Probably circadic issue, idk, body scan works much better.
Benadryl (diphenhydramine)? It probably shouldn't be used for prolonged periods of time (associated with cognitive decline and dementia among the elderly).
Yeah the anticholinergic action has some association with dementia. Lots of medications have some kind of "Anticholinergic burden", drugs that cause low-level cognitive impairment, there's a list.
But I'm almost sure Benadryl isn't good for stress management on the simple basis that functioning cholinergic signaling is the inhibitory agent of the sympathetic nervous system. On any degree of anticholinergic effect you're more of in a flight-or-flight humor. This is apparent on acute effect (overdose,) the anticholinergic toxidrome symptomatology mnemonic goes like this: red as a beet, blind as a bat, mad as hatter, hot as a hare, dry as a bone - all something you could get with amphetamine (a dominant sympathetic nervous system). Do you reckon amphetamine relaxing?
Associated with cognitive decline could just indicate that the people using it are more sickly or have more trouble sleeping, both of which are more strongly correlated with cognitive decline.
4. Find more money so you aren't so stressed about paying the bills that you can sleep well at night so that you have energy to exercise and can afford to eat well.
Hey, I tend to have problems falling asleep because of a busy mind.
What helps me is reading a book. Sometimes have to switch to a more boring book.
In recent years started using Kindle with a very low light setting, going lower every few minutes, even having to enlarge font at the end, to make it readable with such low light.
Regarding number 3. I've developed some GI issues the last year and was diagnosed with celiac disease. My stress and anxiety are higher than ever. I've often reflected on whether the GI issues are causing my stress or just making me more aware of the stress that has always been there.
It emphasizes accepting and allowing feelings of anxiety instead of actively resisting them, breaking the cycle in which worry about worsening anxiety only leads to its intensification.
To add to that, if you have developed panic attacks, sometimes (e.g. at 7/10 anxiety) it’s easier to just escalate it so all the pressure explodes rather than hissing indefinitely.
The most important thing I’ve learned about anxiety in the past year is that the conscious/cognitive part of your brain is not effective at calming down the stress response. I recommend this book to anyone who struggles with anxiety: https://amzn.to/3B3muZ9
> Talking to people is an underrated technique to stop worrying
For me this is really true. I'm more of an introvert, and I don't usually reach out to others very often. It can be in the form of talk therapy in a formal setting with an actual psychologist. It can also just be catching up with a friend, or chatting with a neighbor about something totally unrelated. Anything that can get me outside of my own mind helps. Looking for opportunities to help or become involved in someone else's life is really helpful.
As a fellow introvert, this sounds insurmountably painful. How did you have something to talk about every night? How did you even find that many people to fit into a rotation like that without feeling like you were annoying them? I have so many questions. If you do write that blog post, I'd love to read it. Especially the "how."
Introversion and social anxiety are two different things. I securities about how people see you are third. The original person was introvert.
People talk every day with their spouses and kids. They talk everyday with their collegues or schoolmates. They talk every day with peer group in hobby or sport if they have involved one.
My point here is not that you have to do it or everyone have to do it. But the more you are with people who communicate, the easier it is to find topics. Because it is skill learned by observation and by practicing.
I'm reading this book, "Why We Sleep" by Matthew Walker, and it says the half-life of caffeine is like up to 8 hours ... so having a 3pm coffee means going to bed at midnight with half of it still active.
I've cut coffee out of my diet after noon lunchtime, and I think it's helping ... tough to be sure but as long as I believe it, it's pretty good
I don't think that book is generally considered scientific. It contains a bunch of opinions, but it is not peer reviewed article and not everything in it is backed by good studies.
I have noticed the same effect as well. There is a noticeable difference to the quality of my sleep on the days I have consumed caffeine and the days that I have skipped it. The quality of your sleep likely has effects on your mood, energy levels and over all stress levels.
However, I was referring to the direct effects of caffeine on your stress and anxiety levels. I would go so far as to say that if you are taking steps to reduce your stress and anxiety levels, quitting caffiene should be on the list of some of the first things you try. (Alongside the usual advice of good sleep, exercise, meditation and diet)
"After adjusting for additional dietary, demographic, and lifestyle covariates, positive associations between total weekly caffeine intake and anxiety and depression remained significant"
"Caffeine also increases anxiety in PD patients as well as among healthy adults at these doses although the exact relationship between caffeine-induced anxiety and panic attacks remains uncertain. The results suggest that caffeine targets important mechanisms related to the pathophysiology of PD."
This is close, but misses a major issue: self honesty in one's self conversation. Address that, and the majority of one's stress and anxiety evaporate. The majority of one's stress and anxiety is in the form of negative forecasting unknown future events - essentially fantasizing failure. Address that, and a personal revolution takes place, with the simple but not easy task of self honesty.
There are two parts to this. One is avoiding or preventing stress, which is the primary focus of this article.
The other is getting rid of stress when you already have it.
Personally, I find that leaning into the "fight or flight" response by going for a run or a workout as soon as possible and as intensely as possible works almost every time.
I would rate this post highly. It’s clearly written, pragmatic, accessible, and seemed useful so I’d recommend reading it.
Lately I find myself asking, is the article “better” than what AI could produce?
In this case, the article intuitively seems a grade above similar GPT 3.5 output.
But why so? Is it just my opinion it’s better?
How should “better” be defined? Readability, persuasion, effectiveness as a call to action? Truthfulness seems like it’s own can of worms.
Are there any objective measures of AI vs human output quality to date? Which human? Yikes a new can of worms…
Subjectively, it sometimes seems like the more I read known AI content the more I get a feel for its style. Oops - forgot we’re dealing with a master style chameleon. I think it’s more likely this perception is wrong and it’s easy to overestimate one’s ability to discern generated content.
Apologies for the tangent. I hope it doesn’t detract too much from the more important point that the post is good and I’ve found some of the techniques very helpful.
I think pg tweeted something about this a few days ago. Essentially: if you intend to write about something, first let GPT write it. Then you know what is so obvious about your topic that you don’t need to mention it in your article. The idea being that GPT will rarely output anything surprising, unusual or counter-intuitive.
I'm sure the current epidemic of stress and anxiety has nothing to do with wage deterioration, inflation, layoffs and looming recession, millions of deaths during a global pandemic, or regional conflicts that could lead to war between nuclear-armed adversaries. Or the general meaningless and despair of 21st century life.
People who experience stress and anxiety from financial or health issues should probably just journal more, go for a run, and avoid social media.
There is something we don't yet understand about eye movement and stress/anxiety. Moving your eyes between two points or just sideways back and forth seems to work for many people.
Based on what I hear this seems to be even incorporated in a clinical setting for treating PTSD etc.
I've found the single best measure of my stress and anxiety levels (as at their worst, my subjective perception can't be trusted) is HRV during sleep.
My Garmin watch tracks it, and when I actively try to manage stress and anxiety during the day, it goes from red (for weeks) to immediately recovering into the green that night.
I like a good dataset and the correlation with my stress (backed up by papers on causation) is at least a really strong thing for me.
If I try something new, I can measure the impact on my HRV very clearly.
When I feel I'm burning out, my HRV over the previous few weeks tells the tale.
I think reducing working hour would put everything else in place.
We spend most of hour waking time worrying about a job and how to get ready for that job.
I'd suggest you read though a book on Cognitive Behavior Therapy if you are actually interested. Evidence suggests working through a book to be around as effective as any other intervention. I just did the same[1] and found the solutions extraordinarily useful, highly practical, and totally obvious in retrospect. Additionally, the approach itself deeply appeals to me an intellectual level - like what you'd arrive at if you attempted to turn Stoicism into contemporary practice.
Breathing is key. It's one of the easiest ways to facing your current situation and also distracting yourself every moment or so while you breathe. Exhaling along with mental visualization of purging the mind has the effect of releasing stress. Ofcourse, this needs practice, but that's not too hard with the amount of stressful situations we face everyday.
> Exhaling along with mental visualization of purging the mind
This one amazes me; taking deep breaths to calm myself just makes me feel weird and sometimes even more anxious, but taking deep breaths and imagining releasing a cloud of (deep purple) smoke on the exhale noticeably relaxes me. I wonder if it's the imagination component that makes it better, i.e. giving the mind something to focus on? Or maybe the timing of the exhale changes with the visualization. Either way, a great hack imo.
Surprised this wasn't posted, as it mirrors most of the findings (closed vs open mind; how to optimize creative/unstressed thought, methodologies for maximizing output), John Cleese's talk on Creativity:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Pb5oIIPO62g
I am not a native English speaker so the choice of words may not be the best. Saw another comment mentioning the same. Should have been "defeat" probably?
Related anecdata + a study I found useful. After an auto accident I used to stress out when driving. I would recognize that I was stressing out and try to clamp down on it... which worked quite poorly and made me more stressed. Things got to a points I would hear a crash in my head every time I switched lanes causing even more panic and stress. Things changed after I watched https://www.ted.com/talks/heidi_hanna_the_cure_for_stress . Instead of trying to clamp down I recognized that stressing out is making me more aware to keep me safe and leaned into it. That coupled with some structured breathing helped a lot in just a few weeks and a year later I got back into driving is fun mode.
While all four groups showed significant daily improvement in positive affect and reduction in state anxiety and negative affect, there were significant differences between mindfulness meditation and breathwork in positive affect
Specifically, the cyclic sighing group showed more increase in positive affect toward the end of the study in a way that was significantly different than that for those randomized to mindfulness meditation, who had the least increase in positive affect
Instructions for cyclic sighing:
First step - inhale slowly until the lungs are expanded.
Second step - inhale again once more to maximally fill the lungs.
Third step - slowly and fully exhale until lungs are empty.
Repeat this pattern of breathing for 5 min. Ideally, both inhales are performed via nose and the exhale would be performed via mouth, but, if preferred, the breathing activity can be performed entirely through the nose. It is normal for the second inhale to be briefer than the first.
I am extremely excited that there is a follow up study being planned/worked on. One criticism I would give to the methodology is that instructions for cyclic sighing are by far the simplest compared to mindfulness meditation, box breathing, and cyclic hyperventilation with retention. As such it is possible that this method performed the best because it was simplest to follow.
I also think there might be different kinds of stress responses that might be wired differently, for instance the leaning into stress had hardly helped me. Immersion and slow adaption to stressors seem to work better for long term decrease in my case.
Breath is important, it does help! I have enjoyed the Lungy app recently launched by an HNer.
I've found that most of my stress lives in the pit of my stomach, which is a pretty common description of feeling dread or disappointment or anger, etc.
By focusing on relaxing my stomach I've found it nearly as effective as cyclic breathing or other techniques. I'm sure the two are related but most people talk about the breathing (rightfully so), while I've found actual tension in the abs/stomach manifests a lot of this.
It also affects the way we think, and make decisions.
When we are in "action mode," our thinking becomes fairly "binary," and extreme (eg. "Good|Bad", "Fight|Flight", "Hate|Love").
It also focuses on short-term results, and is biased towards assured results, as opposed to "possible" ones.
That's why I find I need to back away from the computer, when I find myself in a stressball. I make bad decisions.
Managers, politicians, and demagogues of all stripes, have used this for centuries, to get people to support their agendas.